Well there’s something you wish they taught in middle school. And with all the survival skills, from how to tie a tie to how to throw a punch, drilled into us men from our early years, you’d think someone would take the time to tackle the subject. But fear not, I’m here to fill the gaping hole that our fathers and their fathers before them have left with knowledge about how to talk to girls.

Be bold
Every time you find yourself hovering around a woman furiously debating with yourself how and if you’re going to approach her, you will be coming across as timid and fearful. Not exactly what a woman wants in a man.

Be warm and friendly
I always see so many guys walking around trying to look cool or tough, and just taking themselves way too seriously. Be the exception. Putting across a warm vibe to a stranger takes a certain amount of guts and you will immediately set yourself apart from the rest of the circus by doing so. A few words of advice though, don’t just be warm and friendly to the beautiful woman you want to talk to. Be warm and friendly to everyone you meet.

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Keep it simple
During the first few seconds of your interaction, a woman is going to be sizing up a million and one things about you. She will be gauging your body-language, your outfit and deciding if you look like a serial killer. So keep your approach simple. This will give her the chance to get over the first few seconds of the interaction and respond to you in the most normal way possible.

Be outcome independent
Women can smell hidden intent a mile away. So the only thing on your mind when you’re thinking about how to talk to a girl is that you’d really love to meet her and hear her funny stories. Not how great her jeans would look on your bedroom floor.

Make it personal
After the first few minutes of conversation the primary thought running through a woman’s head is going to be, “Where is this going?” So you should aim to make the conversation personal, i.e. about you and her, as soon as you can.
For example you could say: “Hey I really like your laugh. What’s your name?” And when she gives you her name, you can say “Hi, Kathy. It’s nice to meet you. My name’s Artisan. Let’s go sit over at that bench and we can talk some more.”

Have a two way conversation
Remember player, no matter how good a dancer you are, you can’t tango alone. The art of talking to girls isn’t just in talking. It’s also important to get her to talk back and then listen. And you don’t need elaborate conversational gimmicks to do that. You just need to be bold about asking big questions and comfortable with silence until she contributes.

Keep it moving forward
There’s nothing more frustrating for a woman than having a great conversation with a guy who doesn’t take it forward. Remember, if she’s been enjoying the conversation with you for more than a few minutes, she’s most probably open to the idea of taking things somewhere. So invite her to join you for coffee, or set up a meeting next week. For God’s sake don’t be the guy that blabbers on until she gets bored or frustrated and leaves.

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